Diary of an Artist.

2 min readApr 5, 2022


Tell Me.

Digital art by Rebecca Entwisle Art.

Tell me what it’s like to never look back.

Tell me what it’s like to have never been haunted by demons.

Tell me what it’s like to know all you need to know.

Tell me how you forget.

Tell me how you forgive.

Tell me what it’s like to live with no burdens,

to have your shit together,

to love yourself unconditionally,

to live without torture.

My days seem to stretch out in front of me, and as I’m unable to step into them, I watch them evaporate before my eyes, as if the pages of a book are flipping through so quickly, I’m unable to clench at any of the words.

Any menial task feels like, the purest form of exhaustion.

1 step closer, but the goals never come into sight, they sit beyond a hill, beyond a horizon, the end of my suffering rolling farther away as I take one heavy step at a time.

Tell me how to get there.

Layers of self inflicted torment, confuse and bedazzle me with their sheer power, blinding me, I am left a trembling wreck.

My art lay stale, as my mind decays to desease, to parasites that have taken over my physical, and left me paralysed.

Tell me what the point is anymore?




I’m 29, and live in the UK. Trying to make it as an artist in both traditional painting and writing in 2021. Dreaming of writing fiction and painting forever.